the MD poet-laureate

Opus the 1st   Opus the 2nd

The Delphi Oracle

The utterances made were all up the Greek,
Mouthed in the lingo we call "double-speak"
Ambiguous the words to foretell either course
And was he for use for choosing a horse? 

Drachma hard earned led the Spartans to shame
Abortively invested at Olympic the Game.
Double-ended was
Delphi , all believed in its day,
So why didn't Spartans have a drachma each way?

And today in this world many prophets do shout
Fuelled by wine and tormented by gout.
And before you leave offerings at the NEW DELPHI shrine
Make sure that the words are of origin divine.

Has the mantle of Delphi all the shades of the past
And are the predictions both sure and fast?
Or is it a name that DANAOS would deny?
Peloponnese folk who gave things a try.

So brother be careful of the new DELPHI name
And select the adherents who righteousness claim
But if you want in will the oracle apprise
For arcane are the rites and the icons are wise.

"Seamus"

Seamus informs us that "Danaos" is Latin for Greeks, and provides the following reference: on Google look up 'timeo ferentif et dona danaos' - it is a quotation from Handel - Dido is having a talk with Aeneas. Hey, it's all Greek to us.

Hooray For Evolution
 
Does evolution, indeed, cause your Haeckels to rise?,
Whereby fat hippos could take to the skies.
When the mammals from sea came forth to the land,
They died in the process as no one had planned.
 
For this matters not, they must live again,
Lest the mystery unravel and all be in vain.
We love make-believe from the Hollywood strip,
Evolution stands tall, so let all things rip.
 
Though the logic's at sea it found footing on shore,
Long dead sea creatures existed once more.
A remarkable adaption to the beach from the wave,
Three cheers for our theorists, a jolly good save.
 
Our amoeboid friends in primordial ooze
Had nothing to do and nought could amuse.
By forces most mysterious and chemicals vague
They became multi-celled and caused a right plague.
 
Midst vapors of methane and ammonia too,
And flashes of lightning these uni-cells grew.
By acids amino forming nourishing broth
Evolution had started with humungus push-off.
 
That original amoeba was sure some smart kid,
Creating itself, the way that it did.
And in those deep matters called autogenetic,
Science takes refuge from enquiry splenetic.
 
And from self-replication all the fauna arose,
Flying fossils galore, beasts with ungulate toes.
How came order from nothing few people can know
But evolution survives and ever will grow.
 
Happy hypothesising.
 

Pigs  Might  Fly ??

 
Evolution has spread her fabled wings
And imparted her gifts to the swine,
And perhaps with luck to the tortoise that sings,
And even the milking kine.
 
All birds their liquids must minimize
To reach aerodynamic state.
And thus, the cow, if she is wise
Will her milkload inspissate.
 
Percy the Pig all tubby and round
Defies gravity and Nature alike.
Evolutionary breakthrough has he found,
So creationists stay on your bike.
 
All things are possible to them that believe,
Thus reads the good book in its text.
A faith so fervent will wonders achieve,
And elephants will be airborne next.
 
For none can tell and few can prove
What the Lord has allowed in his plan.
And though it fits not in the groove,
His works humble the status of man.
 
If the march of the ages we can't comprehend,
Or construct a history with flaws.
Why ever worry, we'll know in the end,
If man has backed the wrong cause.
 

The Creation of Cats

 
The creation of cats, when did it occur?
Why did God create fleas to inhabit their fur?
And Adam so named this family for all,
Both skinny and lean, and the podgy furball.
 
And if you eat flesh from pussy nocturnal
Will you lose life in time most eternal?
But pussy's not worried for still does he purr,
Life's for the present, and should we demur?
 
Created by fiat the tiger's stripe bold?
Best admired from a distance if you wish to grow old.
Or did aeons of time work a miracle slow?,
Please write in, and let us all know.  
 
Now the lion in the future eats straw like an ox,
An evolutionary trend that creates waves of shocks?
And out in the field will the lamb  he espy,
Without that glint of food in his eye.
 
The leopard  comes spotty, and no he's not ill,
That's his natural pattern that has stayed with him still.
Can the leopard his spots over time ever change,
Or at the beginning did the Lord them arrange?
 
And in Adam's life time would creation occur,
With not an extension so some people aver.
They say it occurred at a juncture in time,
Signed, sealed, delivered, and not from the slime.
 
Whatever your view you are bound to be wrong,
For contentious the tunes in this dissonant song.
If Darwin's correct the future is bright,
But hovering around a gloomy long night.
 
Bon Speculation.
 
 
Sinner  Repant
 
Sinner repant, your end is in sight,
And all is laid bare which gives no delight.
But the cloak of salvation will cover provide,
Supplied by the righteous for a fee on the side.
 
A wide range of worthies will hear you confess,
And when all is done their name will you bless.
And for church membership you really should strive,
And weekly cough up with your free-given tithe?
 
And many new challenges divinely arise,
Cleaning the loo which will help you get wise.
Humility is a virtue, to the elders you look,
Taking their cue from the leather-bound book.
 
For men of great honor will have you in mind,
Sweeping the floor and jobs of that kind.
For if you want truly to reach unto heaven,
Follow their lead and suppress all the leaven.
 
And as you progress hymn books will you dole,
For singing is noble and good for the soul.
And take your note book for sermons inspired,
And stifle that yawn if you're all  bored and tired.
 
Though many may ramble and Scripture oft' quote,
Write it all down though the guy is a goat.
The most lowly it seems drive the fanciest car,
Paid from your "offerings" which never go far.
 
You are honored to walk in their shadow you know,
Men of distinction who walk not in a show. ( Psalm 39:6).
For you are unworthy their shoes so to clean,
Remember your place and don't make a scene.
 
Whilst all men are equal in the sight of the Lord
Some are MORE SO by the way you're ignored.
You are muck metal but they are fine gold,
Worship their feet and do as you're told.
 
It seems their own message does never get through,
For they are most special and the knocks are for you.
But time has a catchup which though most delayed ( Eccl 8:11)
Brings forth a comeuppance with their record re-played.
 

The Kingdom Express

Ho, come to the waters and freely imbibe,
For nothing the cost, no need to subscribe,
Free is the word that loosens your soul,
Removing all chains and making you whole

Many voices are shouting their view of the word
It's all about brands which sounds most absurd.
Join the elite with the gospel refrain,
And commit all your cash to the church gravy train.

The Kingdom Express one day will take off,
But prior to departure it's trotters in trough'
With snouts there as well it sounds most unclean,
On the back of the hog few wish to be seen.

Times really are tough in your Yankee-based church
As from Rollers to Beamers the many do lurch.
The cry is for funds to spread the "good news",
Through mountains of cash each card-toter chews.

Help oil the wheels of the Kingdom Express,
The staff there await to receive your largesse.
It's all in God's name, so in a good cause,
But many the wolf with voracious, sharp jaws.

For many's the train with a false whistle blow
And parading as kosher, as you surely must know.
Bench-test all "prophets", do any conform?
And which one is right concerning the storm.

Board the right car, make sure of the fare,
It's really quite cheap to book a sound chair.
Alas and alack wolves charge a huge price,
And what you oft' get is not always nice.

Ho, come to the waters and pay the Lord's price.
The preachers are greedy and want a huge slice.
Take care of your funds and give to the poor,
Let the preacher ask God to open the door.

Hot Goss

Now Missing Dimensions brings you news
And gossip columns you can peruse,
Where everything is running hot, 
With a host of stars right on the spot.

Here are listed all the dudes
And all their helpful attitudes.
For MD has the lot on show
Where else would you want to go?

For many players are on our stage,
Their little acts our readers gauge.
And if you do not like a scene,
Sock it to 'em, straight between.

Where else comments can you leave
And show the heart right on your sleeve?
If the prawn is mighty raw
Leave a note at MD's door.

And if you hurt and inwardly writhe 
About that rort some call the tithe.
Let off steam and use our space,
Waiting there for YOU to grace.

We need input from one and all,
Have a blast, have a ball.
Scribe your comments, one, two, three,
And would you know the deal is free.

Our site is full of color bright,
The actors are a sheer delight,
What you would as fiction rate
Happens here in truest state.
No title... "Whirled News" perhaps?

Across the globe the scene is heating,

The President round the Bush ain't beating.
Across the blue, missiles soon scudding
And into Baghdad's camels thudding.
 
Saddam Hussein could have the answers,
Distract the foe with belly dancers:
The devout on mats will soon be praying
Whilst exotic costumes and limbs are swaying.
 
In the region  of oil-rich Kuwait,
Beneath the palm is many a date.
And the West hopes hard, hard as hell,
The Iraquis keep matches away from each well.
 
Meanwhile the Inspectors look for clues,
The horse has bolted by many a ruse.
By sleight of hand and not in vain
There are many bolt-holes for Saddam Hussein.
 
With doubles as well in many a place,
Which likeness is his real face?
Terror weapons, they say,are truly well hidden
Expressly at sites Saddam has bidden.
 
And with those war-drums loudly sounding,
It seems to war the States are bounding;
An attack on Baghdad that's none too cruisy,
And will this dustup be a doozie?

News BBC 9/1/03 50 year Scotch now worth USD 9000 a bottle

 
Hoots mon, come now open your purse
And spend a bawbee on malt.
This time next year the price is worse
And will cause ye many a jolt.
 
A bonny wee bargain at NINE GRAND,
And cheap at TWICE the cost.
Now if ye dither, understand,
Your chance forever is lost.
 
So canny be, into your sporran
Dig deep and part with coin.
Spend that heirloom golden florin
That has been protecting your groin.
 
Then pour a wee dram with careful hand
And spill nae many a drap.
Then slowly sip this contraband
And the spots on the floor ye lap.
 
Pleasant drinking.

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