George Carlin on BullShit
(From a 1997 HBO special.)
"When it comes to BullShit, truly major league BullShit, you have to stand back in awe of the truly heavyweight champion of false promises and exaggerated claims:
Religion. Organized religion.
It is no contest.
Religion easily has the best BullShit story of all time.
Religion has convinced people that there is an invisible man living in the sky, who watches everything you do for every minute of every day.
And the invisible man has a list of ten specific things that he doesn't want you to do.
If you do any of these things, he will send you to a special place of burning and fire and smoke and anguish for you to live forever and suffer and burn and scream until the end of time.
But he loves you.
He loves you and he needs money.
He always needs money.
He is all-powerful, all wise, all present, all knowing.
He just can't handle money.
Religion takes in billions and billions of dollars.
They pay no taxes.
But somehow they always need money.
You talk about a good BullShit story...
If I may be permitted a small pun: Holy Shit!"
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