The Painful Truth About The Worldwide Church of God
War Story
My fish is better than your fish

in the beginning...

In the beginning was the "Jesus Fish." This was a little fish symbol that is supposed to represent one's affiliation with Christianity. The story goes that in Biblical days when two people crossed paths on a dirt road, one would draw half a fish in the sand with his sandal. If the other was of "like mind" he would finish drawing the fish in the sand. They would both smile with glee because they were both "believers." They could now associate with each other. This secret sign was apparently created in the midst of religious persecution against Christians. The "Jesus Fish" you see on cars today represents the Jesus of the Bible who is also apparently considered the "Fisher of Men" so the story goes. These decals come with just the fish or with the word "Jesus" inside or the Greek letters for "Fish" (see above). This is the symbol some Christians feel compelled to place on their vehicles as a sign of their faith so that others of "like mind" can honk their horns or wave and wink as they pass by. It's sort of like saying, "Hey, draw a fish in the sand with me since we both know what it's like to be persecuted." It also says "I am proud of my faith and want the guy driving behind me to know it, because I know he or she will care." This fish symbol usually is intended to communicate to the driver behind that the driver in front is a Christian. The intent could also be to communicate their affection towards fish in general, assuming they do not know the origination of the symbol.

and then...

And then came the evolutionist (a.k.a. Darwinians) who responded to the "Jesus Fish" decal with a fish with legs and the word "Darwin" inside. Variations on this include the more straightforward use of the word "Evolve" for those who are not familiar with Mr. Darwin's work (see above). This "Darwin Fish" represents the theory of evolution. This "fish with legs" is supposedly reminiscent of the primitive life form of the sea that evolved, growing legs and becoming a land dweller, which apparently would be our great, great, great grand-pappy many times back. Yes, your ancestry began with a fish who grew legs, became a monkey and now here we are. Apparently this is the evolutionist response to the "Jesus Fish." Ha, ha! Now the Darwinians had their little decal and better yet, it mocked those who used the "Jesus Fish" to parade their association with the Christian faith. Perhaps the "Darwin Fish" people were annoyed by the "Jesus Fish" people driving around with their little "Jesus Fish" in everyone's face. Let's face it, the original symbol can be very annoying if you don't care for what it represents. And some people just don't care for fish period. So, this was their way of making a statement. How long could one expect the evolutionist to go on before doing something to mock the sign of a creationist?

which was followed by...

The Darwin crowd got to have their fun mocking the fish symbol which was followed by every other group (religious or otherwise) getting their fish symbol in the mix. (Some are illustrated above). If any of these fish offend you -- especially that one to the right -- it's recommended you look away and think happy thoughts or pray to Jesus or something.. If you would like to get your hands on one of these fish, check out

and finally...

This was all fine and good. Just about every group had their little fish icons and did their part mocking the original "Jesus Fish" and finally it was over. Everybody, it would seem, had made their little point. But, oh no. The war was not over. Apparently the "Jesus Fish" supporters didn't appreciate how the "Darwin Fish" folks had started such a horrible string of mockeries. This was an outcry! How dare they mock a perfectly good religious icon. So in the spirit of "one-upmanship" (did somebody say, "turn the other cheek?") they created the "Big Jesus Fish" and "The Big Truth Fish" which depicts the fish called "Jesus" or "Truth" eating the "Darwin Fish." Ah-ha!, said the "Jesus Fish" supporters. And you Darwin supporters thought you were so clever. We gotcha back!! See, the "Fish of Truth" of OUR faith is so big and powerful that it can eat your puny little, two-legged wimp of fish for lunch. Our belief system is more powerful and overall just better than yours. In fact, we're pretty sure WE'RE just better than you are, period, because our faith is about the truth not just some theory named after some lame atheist., na, na, na, na. Take that, you evolutionist, Darwin-worshiping poo-poo brain! Two can play at that game.

but really, who gives a fish...

(Note: is no longer available)



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