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Issue XIII  - July 19  2002

COG7 Board backs President: While we don't normally comment on internal affairs of the Church of God (Seventh Day), it was interesting to note that president Whaid Rose's regular column in the June Bible Advocate was replaced by a statement of support from the church's Board. In part the statement reads:

The office of president is the most visible of our church's leadership positions. The person serving us as president is often the primary lightning rod for criticism. It goes with the territory.

... we, the board members of the Church of God (Seventh Day) General Conference, wish to remind you that, though we are less visible than he. our president is directly accountable to the board, serves at the pleasure of the board, and represents the vision and positions of the board concerning the church.

While Rose appears to be having a stressful tenure at the helm of COG7 (some of it attributable to collateral damage from WCG fallout), it is interesting to note that the elected board isn't afraid to use the word "accountable" when speaking of the presidential office, and clearly demonstrate that they are nobody's "rubber stamp." We wonder if the WCG board could say the same.

The June BA also features an article by former Plain Truth managing editor, Brian Knowles, entitled "Learning God's Priorities." The June BA is available online in PDF format.

Plain Talkin' : Dateline Pasadena reports that the following letter was sent to the Pasadena Star News for the July 14 edition:

A Modest Proposal

With the apparent demise of the Legacy project, may I suggest the following use for the Ambassador College Campus:  as a homeless shelter and soup kitchen for unemployed Ambassador graduates.

Ron Beideck
Portland OR

Rock caption contributions: Oh boy, and we thought the AW sense of humor was already a bit jaundiced! As promised, here are the captions sent in for the photograph of Gerry and the rock (click on the thumbnail to view it in its full glory.) The suggested captions are presented just as they were received, and in the order they were received. Thanks to all who participated. How do we pick a winner? We're doing a Pontius Pilate by washing our hands and passing the job onto the eminently qualified Seamus, MD's very own poet-laureate. We'll post his decision next week. Meantime, no more captions please!

flurry_kneeling.jpg (52343 bytes)1. Flurry's Pet Rock

2. OK, officer, what's the next part of the field sobriety test?... HIC!!!!!

3. This is Gerald Flurry, auditioning for the Ned Beatty scene in Deliverance 2-- Let Me Show You How to Bend Over and Take it With a Smile

4. "Oh schist! I don't think I can get up again!"

5. Gerry's pillock stone

6. "Wow, Man! Now that I have Herb's prayer rock, my future's so bright, I gotta wear shades!"

7. "Dammit, I've caught my groin between a rock and a hard place and I can't get up!"

8. "And I shall call my prayer rock MINI-ME."

9. "In the evening when I'm here alone and playing with myself, I get my rocks off with a big ol' glass of Gerry-tall and bottle of Scotch, and find that I have some of my best prophetic visions when I'm drunk off my butt and passed out cold.

10. "And greetings friends around the ward.  This rock serves as a perpetual memorial showing the impotence of Herbert and uh....marks the spot where he had a bowel movement that looked just like me."

11. "Hey, I just found my 'pet' rock!"  David C.

12. "I think being on both knees will make me holier-than-thou!"  David C.

13. (A) Quickly!  Take a picture, now!  Them knees are killing me!"  David C. (B) "Hurry up an' take this picture, will ya!  My knees are killing me!"  

14. "Aw, Shit!  Remind me to disfellowship whoever has been walking their dog out here!" 

15. Well, lookie here!  There's a carved inscription that says, uh, ...To The Unknown Gawd!"  David C.  

16. "As I placed my hand on this rock, I can REALLY FEEL the sudden SURGE of POWER coursing      throughout my body and..., oops!  rats!  I shouldn't have taken those E-Lax pills this morning!!"  David C.

17.  "Love me like a rock, oh baby, love me like a rock"

18.  " I thought Petra would be bigger than this! "

19.  "I do not worship idols or end time apostles"

20.  "Ok, you got me, but how did you know where I hid the real truth"

21. "Upon this rock I will build my church"

22. "I hid my bottle out here somewhere. Hiccup!"

23. "Set 'em up, bartender."

24. Wasted away again in Margaritaville: "Boy, am I STONED!"

25. "Hey! Who took the bottle I had stashed under here?"

26.  That six-pack must be affecting my vision; I thought this was a sheep!

27. "I wish Mrs. Flurry would keep the dog away from this rock."

28. I didn't know kidney stones could get so big!

29.  With Tim Conway now enjoying life as a retired actor, Gerald Flurry graciously volunteers for the next Dorf series installment: Dorf on Prayer Rocks."

30. Off His ROCKer--Gerald Flurry tests the gullibility of his dumb sheep.

31.  Stone of Stumbling:  Flurry Fails Sobriety Test. "But ossifer, I tripped over this little rock!"

32.  Historical Photo:  Self-appointed "prophet" crawls out from beneath rock, founds cult.

33.  "Yes, brethren, it was at THIS VERY ROCK that Herbert Armstrong prayed for forgiveness for rape and incest--dozens, even hundreds of times!"

34.  Millstone and Offender:  Is there a sea nearby?

35.  "...and these cool SUNGLASSES were once worn by Jim Jones!"

36.  Meteorite narrowly misses cult founder; angel promises better aim next time.

37.  Gerald Flurry interviews prospective PCG elder:  "I like the way he thinks!"

38. "And the Lord spoke to me and said 'Upon this Rock I will build my cash'". Jonathan Higbed

39. "And the lord told me that anyone or anything that touches this Rock is hallowed. Therefore these squirrel droppings will be enclosed in a bullet-proof glass case with "Mystery of the Ages" where they will be equally inspiring". Jonathan Higbed

40. Flurry lovingly caresses the rock he crawled out from under  Bill Fairchild.

41. Flurry admires the most intelligent thing on his campus. Bill Fairchild.

42. Flurry, seeing if HWA crawled back under the rock from whence he came.

New PCG discussion group: A new Yahoo group was formed this week for those wishing to discuss the Flurry cult (Philadelphia Church of God). The established Flurry group, moderated by Henrik Blunck, is perceived by some as "pro-HWA." The new group's description states: Discuss the Philadelphia Church of God and Armstrongism in general. ALL view points are tolerated, anything goes. The new group can be found at http://groups.yahoo.com/group/PCG/

Meantime the Missing Dimension Yahoo group signed up its 50th member this week. The MD group features postings from Dateline Pasadena and drafts of some Ambassador Watch stories.

Bookshelf

There's a new book on Christian Legalism listed on Amazon called "Sabbath, Circumcision, and Tithing: Which Old Testament Laws Apply to Christians?". The author is Michael Morrison, the WN writer. We can tell you that the book was due for release in June, weighs in at a hefty 308 pages and retails for $21.95. Mike follows in the footsteps of Joe Tkach (Transformed by Truth) and Michael Feazell (Liberation of the Worldwide Church of God). 

Eye to Eye with Spanky: Did Rod Meredith fast last Sabbath when the LCG beseeched the Eternal about the deeply significant matter of moving their offices? According to a correspondent the Presiding Evangelist recently underwent another eye operation (the story of his 1960s surgery was told by David Robinson.) Our source tells us he was still recovering during the fast. Check out the letter at the top of this weeks mailbag.

WCG evangelist buried by Messianic Rabbi: The final chapter in the Stan Rader story had an unusual twist. This report from Dateline Pasadena.

It seems that Stan Rader had a regular Christian Memorial service, but had a Messianic Jewish burial. After his Memorial service, the guests were invited to go to Annendale Country Club for a reception. The family staying behind for a private burial at graveside. That burial was done by a Messianic Rabbi.

What's up with the Hulme COG? David Hulme's Church of God, an International Community has posted the July edition of its Church of God News (PDF format).

According to a report on Bob Thiel's site, the Hulmerous sect is having a hard time extracting enough bucks from the brethren to fund their upcoming festival program. Thiel quotes Hulme as saying: in the US the festival fund is well under budget--by about $41,000... without the anticipated levels it will be difficult to meet all of the budgeted needs.. If you have not already sent in your "tithe of a tithe," please help us out as soon as you are able.

Kubik interviewed by The Journal: The latest issue of Dixon Cartwright's publication The Journal has been released, and the Internet edition is now online. Featured in the June 30 edition is an interview with UCG elder Victor Kubik about his charity Lifenets. The paper also reports that the longtime SEP facility in Orr has been demolished (maybe when they've finished they could start on a certain hall in Pasadena.) The print edition (article not online) vigorously stirs the bucket with a couple of articles on the ordination of women.

Robidoux on Court TV: The June court proceedings which resulted in the conviction of Jacques Robidoux have been screening this week in the US on Court TV, which has details of the case online, including references to the Worldwide (they spell it World Wide) Church of God. 

 


Ambassador Watch is part of the Missing Dimension website - www.missingdimension.com. It is published online each Friday.  The contact address is: missingdimension@ihug.co.nz  Dateline Pasadena can be reached at datelinepasadena@yahoo.com
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