The Full Monte

Monte Wolverton has a new futuristic/Christian apologetic book out: The Remnant. It's described by Monte as "a physical and spiritual expedition through a dystopian world." I hope Monte's writing style is better in the book.

Wolverton acknowledges that The Remnant fits in the Christian fiction genre, though he's not keen on pigeonholing it.

"Well, I'd rather not have this lumped in with the Christian fiction genre. I suppose it's technically Christian fiction, but I wanted it to reach a broader readership. Regular readers don't want to be slobbered on with lots of syrupy religious language. I personally find that off-putting. Christians would get more traction in the world if we made an effort to be—normal. As C.S. Lewis once said, "The world does not need more Christian literature. What it needs is more Christians writing good literature."'

Greg Albrecht's CWR is, as expected, in donkey-deep with the publication, which doesn't infuse me with any great enthusiasm. As "an award winning author" you'd think Monte could find a more credible publisher. So no, I won't be ordering a copy personally, mainly because the plot line doesn't particularly appeal (dystopian futures? [Dystopia: an imagined place or state in which everything is unpleasant or bad, typically a totalitarian or environmentally degraded one.] Christianity meets Mad Max? Whatever happened to optimistic sci-fi?) though I have a good deal of genuine respect for Monte's non-religious work - how could anyone not appreciate his his brilliant caricatures and 'toons'.

More information at CWR and an interview. The bio statement underneath the interview reveals that Monte "is an ordained minister", but then leaves it hanging. Surely not GCI? Please, tell us it ain't so! C'mon Monte, spill the beans.

CWGMR

If you've hung around this blog for any length of time you know that I don't have a high opinion of Greg Albrecht's Plain Truth Ministries, nor the slogan "Christianity without the Religion." Albrecht publishes a reasonably substantial quarterly magazine called CWR, the latest issue of which is now out, but I think it'd be more accurately titled CWGMR (Christianity With Genetically Modified Religion).

Which isn't to say that the burned-over constituency of the COGs won't find some interesting stuff here, particularly those who've traded down (or is it up?) to a less demanding, more evangelical type of faith. Hey, whatever works!

One article took my eye in particular. Zack Hunt writes some really good material, and he's a regular columnist for the "Gregoriana", so to speak. His blog is definitely worth the occasional visit (I even link to it over on my disgracefully inactive Otagosh blog.) In this issue he has a one-page piece with the provocative headline "Sometimes I Wish the Bible Had Never Been Written." Well worth the trip across to check out.

CWR magazine is available in - shudder - flipping book format, but you can hit the download button when that screen comes up and access the far more readable PDF version.

It's the PT Jim, but not as we know it

The May/June issue of The Plain Truth is out.

The Plain Truth? Is that still a thing?

We're talking about the 8-page newsletter produced by Greg Albrecht, the man behind the slogan "Christianity without the religion". As if that could possibly be a thing.

Page 1: Greg on the fourth (and fifth and sixth) beatitudes.

Page 2: Greg on grace.

"Christ-followers believe that God became a man, and that God is One and yet at the same time, He is Three—Father Son and Holy Spirit. That doesn’t make sense! You want something that makes sense?" 

Well, yes actually. Or is it a case of "Blessed are the incoherent". And blessed are those who have no idea beyond romanticized mush about the historical development of the Trinity doctrine.

Greg's argument - if it can be dignified with that term - is reflected in his title: "Grace is Senseless, Irrational and Absurd." Really? Does Greg feel this way about every act of unearned kindness? Does compassion make no sense in Greg's life? A decent theologian might assert that grace is surprising, unexpected and undeserved, but that's not the same thing. You can certainly say that it runs contrary to the wisdom of the everyday dog-eat-dog world; but again, that's not the same thing either. At best you could say that grace seems at times to be irrational to certain people.

But to move from overblown polemic about the imagined and arbitrary qualities of grace to a semi-mystical dogma about the necessary incoherence of the Trinity? That's, well, "senseless, irrational and absurd."

Page 3: More Greg on the beatitudes.
Page 4: Even more Greg on the beatitudes.

Page 5: Some bloke named Stephen Crosby on the new covenant.
Page 6: Second page of the Crosby article.

Page 7: A one-page column by Monte Wolverton.

Page 8: Fluff.

Perhaps the most interesting item is an ad for an upcoming novel by Monte; The Remnant. Monte is described as an "award-winning author", though the ad doesn't specify which book or which award. Wolverton is an insightful guy and - keeping a family tradition alive - a fantastic political cartoonist. You can't help wonder why he still hangs out with Albrecht in his tin-pot ministry. I guess he has his reasons.

The PDF is available to download.

Greg's Great Leap Backward

In the same begging letter cited in the last blog entry, Greg pulls a classic "herbie."

In an effort to do more with less and in order to maintain the high quality of service God has allowed us to provide, we have decided to print fewer issues next year, while increasing the size of each issue. By mailing almost the same number of pages each year, but doing so less frequently, we believe we can make the best use of the donations God provides.

You have received a free one-year PT subscription (thanks to many who have provided the necessary funding). Future issues of the PT are provided as a benefit for ongoing PTM contributors.

If you have not yet donated, or if you are not regularly and consistently supporting this ongoing work, we now ask you to carefully consider the ministry we provide and prayerfully consider providing financial help to PTM.

Those who are receiving their initial, free PT subscription (thanks to the generosity of our friends and supporters!) as well as ongoing PTM contributors will receive their first quarterly issue (Winter 2009) of the new, 48-page Plain Truth shortly after Thanksgiving.

Greg also asks a highly pertinent question (emphasis here, and elsewhere in the quotes, is in the original.)

If you have not yet contributed to PTM, what are you waiting for?

Please Greg, ask me, ask me... I'm waiting for pigs to fly.

Now, let's see if we can "translate" all of this into plain English.

• The Plain Truth is now only going out quarterly.
• The Plain Truth is now only going out to regular supporters - no free subs.

Quite an accomplishment! Yes folks, it can't have been easy, but Greg has effectively killed off the goose that laid the golden eggs.

The Plain Truth is, to all intents and purposes, dead.

Greg knocks... with the sound of a mighty wind

Oh dear, oh dear. The Lord is withholding his blessings from Greg P.T.M. Albrecht...

September 2009

Dear Friend,

This has been a challenging year for PTM, and based on your letters, phone calls and emails, it has been for most of you as well. We have discovered that PTM doesn’t have as much income as we used to, and, neither do many of you!

One of the things my wife and I have done at our house is to eat more beans. I know, it sounds like I’m going to tell a joke. No, it’s the truth! My wife and I have started to eat more green, red, black and pinto beans. Ironically, we’ve discovered that eating more beans and less meat and chicken is actually beneficial to our health!

Eating pinto beans for the evening meal (as the main course) takes me back to my childhood in Texas when "supper" in my family consisted of pinto beans and cornbread about 90% of the time. Tightening our belts, literally and figuratively, is not always a bad thing – there can be unexpected benefits!

My purpose of this letter is to let you know how PTM is squeezing every dime and pinching every penny, while still proclaiming God’s grace as powerfully and effectively as we can. Never, ever forget that lives are being changed by this ministry!

We at PTM are committed, by God’s grace, to continue to do what we can to minister to you, and many, many others. In order to continue this work, we believe that God expects us to make our needs known to you.

A) We believe that we need to “knock on your door” (Matthew 7:7-8) so that you will know and understand the needs PTM faces.

B) We believe that God wants PTM to make wise and prudent decisions about how we continue to proclaim his grace.

C) We also believe that we need to make those we are blessed to be able to serve aware of how we are pinching pennies.

What is PTM doing to pinch pennies? PTM is…

REDUCING EMPLOYEE COMPENSATION: Our diligent, hard working staff understands that we must reduce their compensation, as a necessary step in continuing to make this ministry available. We pray this is only a temporary measure…..

Oh the travail, the pain! Greg, onetime Herbal evangelist, reduced to beans. And we all know the effect beans have. Brethren, I implore you to go down on your knees and pray that the Eternal deliver Greg, Monte and the loyal staff of PTM from the perils of spiritual flatulence! Greg already has a problem with long-windedness, as we all know. This could push the poor man over the edge completely! And then there's the issue of increased carbon emissions over Duarte. This is a crisis brethren! Send Greg no money... but a love-offering of Alka-Seltzer may well be appreciated.

Doh!

The Simpsons Movie is out, and a new cultural high water mark has been reached that far surpasses Dovstoyesky's modest pot-boilers. To celebrate the movie's release, Pastor Generalissimo Joe Tkach, unelected "president-for life" of the WCG, has produced what is obviously a tribute to Homer Simpson. Read the following (source) in a Bart or Homer voice and you'll see what I mean.

* * * *
SPECIAL LEGAL NOTICE to all U.S. and International Pastors, Mission Directors and National Directors

As most of you know, the Worldwide Church of God, USA ("WCG") and Plain Truth Ministries Worldwide ("PTM") became totally separate and distinct legal entities, effective January 1, 2006, in a friendly disassociation approved by, among others, the Board of Directors and the Advisory Council of Elders. Subsequently, on August 4, 2006, the WCG transferred to PTM all its right, title, and interest to the United States Trademark "The Plain Truth" (the "Trademark").

WCG has no rights to the Trademark (subject to an exception that WCG may mention the magazine in reciting the WCG history, but no one should rely upon this exception without first discussing it with the Legal Department).

So as to be clear, in the present case the Trademark is a title – i.e. the words "The Plain Truth." When I refer to "the Trademark," I mean this title or its legal equivalent, the title "Plain Truth."

Since WCG no longer owns the United States Trademark, WCG is directing that all entities under the legal control of WCG (defined below) discontinue all present mentions of the Trademark in any U.S. media and refrain from any future use or mention of the Trademark in the United States. Precisely what this means is explained more below.

Entities under the legal control of the WCG include, for example, but are not limited to, all American churches and any international National Church or any local congregation of a National Church which operates in its country (a) under the registration of the WCG, California Corp. or the WCG D.C. Corp., or (b) where the legal link to the WCG is such that the international National Church or its congregations are subordinate to the WCG in that it must obey the operational directives of the WCG.

The WCG requests, and strongly advises, any entity related ecclesiastically to the WCG, even though it not be legally controlled by WCG (defined below), to also discontinue any present mention of the Trademark in the United States and refrain from future mention. Although the WCG would not incur liability for any infringement by an entity not legally controlled by it, the entity in question may still incur liability for itself if it infringes on the Trademark.

Entities affiliated ecclesiastically but not controlled legally by the WCG would be those that are recognized by the WCG as part of the denomination, but which would not be legally bound under the terms of its own charter, statutes, articles, bylaws, or the laws of its country, to obey directives of the WCG in this matter.

Discontinuation of present use and refraining from future use means to not mention or display the Trademark in any media, including, without limitation, print, radio, television, and the internet which circulates in the United States, or which originates on a web site that is hosted in the United States. This means, for example, that we are directing that no newsletter, magazine, broadcast, and no web pages of WCG or local web pages of any of its American local congregations, and no web pages hosted by the WCG directly or indirectly (even though the web page may be that of a non-controlled affiliate) may mention the Trademark (unless, of course, you have the written permission of Plain Truth Ministries Worldwide, which it may or may not grant). For example, a controlled entity may not in the United States advertise a magazine which carries the Trademark, may not show its picture, and may not link to the Plain Truth Ministries Worldwide website without its written permission.

We are directing that the Trademark not be infringed here in the United States because it is a registered United States Trademark. At least two other international magazines, one from England and one from Malaysia, each use the same words as the Trademark in their title, and, presumably own the words they use as their own trademark in their own country, and perhaps in other places outside their country also (although not in the United States). These entities may continue to use their own trademark in their own areas. They may wish to check with their own legal counsel for further clarification.

Nonetheless, no controlled entity of the WCG may show pictures of, advertise, nor mention the magazine with the American trademark, nor mention or advertise the two other international magazines with the same words of the Trademark, in any media it produces and originates or circulates in the United States. For example, the WCG publication Together may not advertise either of the other two magazines (published in England and Malaysia) which use the same words as the Trademark, even though the other two magazines own their own trademarks in their own countries.

The WCG wishes to stress that this directive is to ensure that the WCG, nor any of its controlled entities, inadvertently infringe upon the Trademark. This directive does not indicate any ill-will between the WCG and PTM. No such ill will exists. The dictates of the United States trademark laws require the foregoing restrictions on use. Now that PTM owns the Trademark, it is a fact that it may lose its rights in the Trademark if it allows others to use the Trademark improperly. If the circumstances were reversed, PTM would be required to issue the same directive, and would do so.

I want to stress that our policy here is slightly more restrictive than the law requires, and that the WCG is not, by adopting this strict policy, agreeing to abide by a stricter standard than the law requires, nor is it waiving any rights of any kind it may have in the matter. Although it is possible that, under some very special circumstances, a mention of the Trademark may be allowable because such mention fits within a legally recognizable permitted fair or informational use with or without a disclaimer, or because such a mention is historic, such mentions would be rare and to avoid inadvertent infringements our internal policy is that no mentions of any kind may be made without advance permission from the Legal Department.

Finally, we understand that this issue is complex and the requirements of the law sometimes appear counterintuitive and contrary even to the Trademark owner's own interests. Therefore, we invite anyone who needs clarification of any kind to contact the Legal Department by email at Legal.office@wcg.org. We prefer the questions be in writing so that we may clearly understand the situation and reply in writing as well.

* * * *

So could this have something to do with the bizarre anti-church gospel being preached by Joe's former best-buddy and Plain Truth "owner-operator" Greg ("religion is bad") Albrecht? Is Joe embarrassed over Greg? Is Greg embarrassed over Joe? Do they still exchange Xmas cards? Is Joe still on the PTM board? Does anyone with living brain cells find this directive convincing? Is Greg still a minister of WCG, or even a member? If he isn't, how come he gets away with calling himself "pastor"? Will either Greg or Joe have a hernia if AW links to PTM?

And most importantly, is there a donut in the house?

Greg's Dregs

I think I'm probably not all that unusual among ex-WCG members in having a hard time reconnecting to the idea of "church." In fact, truth to tell, I find the whole idea of driving off to a weekly service quite stressful, and nothing fires my indignation more than some smug, self-satisfied, Bible-toting pastor who passes judgement on non-attenders as lazy or uncommitted. Here's a recent example from the normally urbane bloggin' Baptist pastor Jim West:

Everyone who attends church has heard, and maybe even used, some excuse as to why worship couldn’t be attended. From the mysterious illness that strikes at 10 on Sunday morning but which clears up by noon so that the mall can be visited, to the sudden visitor who just dropped in as they were “leaving”; to the tiredness from a late Saturday night out; to simple laziness. And anything and everything in between, including, but not limited to, bad preaching, boring sunday school lessons, and too many other things to do.

But the real reason, the 100% always accurate reason, the authentic truth of the matter is that people stay home from worship because they don’t want to have to mend their ways or change their lives. They know, after all, that if they KNOW what God wants them to do, they will have no excuse for not doing it. So, they stay home on Sunday or they trot home after sunday school so that they can avoid the inevitable claim of God on their lives.

They don’t stay home because something more important has come up- because there is nothing more important than God. They stay home because they are afraid that God may want something of them. Namely, them. (Source)

Given that level of rhetoric it's not surprising that disaffected Christians might embrace the individualism of the Internet and a "church experience" without a church. Enter former WCG luminary Greg Albrecht and his Plain Truth Ministries. I'm not sure how Greg ended up with The Plain Truth, but it seems to be his personal play-pen these days, and he has taken it in directions antithetical not only to WCG but most other churches. Greg is now High Priest of stay-at-home Churchianity parading as liberation from religion.

I suppose I should be sympathetic, but tune in to Greg's "Christianity Without the Religion" (CWR) and you'll discover just how parasitic Albrechtism really is. Schmalzy music, online communion (BYO of course!) and bucketfuls of preacher Greg's platitudinous pontifications. This, if Greg is to be believed, is the wave of the future: Christianity minus community or commitment (but they'll take your money.) And this bloodless waffle, Greg assures us, is religion-free!

There's certainly a case for a radical rethink of the way Christians "do" church. But Albrecht's ministry is far from radical: an unappealing mix of evangelical glibness and sectarian self-absorption. Greg may extoll "Christ-centered" faith, but it seems far more Greg-centered to me.

Of course, that's just my opinion. But I'd pay good money to be see Greg lock horns with Jim West on this issue. Praise the Lord and pass the squishy tomatoes!


Addendum: How about a caption for that photo?
"Hey, check out my threads..."
"No sorry, I'd love to contribute but I left my wallet at home..."
"Hey, c'mon guys, gimme back my clerical collar..."
There's got to be better ones than those ;-)